


Never Without You

by kaksinaisuus



Category: Free!
Genre: Confessions, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-27
Updated: 2015-07-27
Packaged: 2018-04-11 12:42:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4435904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kaksinaisuus/pseuds/kaksinaisuus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All he had to do was to answer a simple question. </p>
<p>A simple question? </p>
<p>A “simple” question… That could ruin everything he has now.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Never Without You

**Author's Note:**

> Based on a roleplay with isitloveorsaba and panthera_pardus including my own secondary persona.  
> Hope you all enjoy!

It was another practice day. A regular one, for everyone but the redheaded boy. Rin was feeling uneasy and troubled since the beginning of that day. Although his life seemed perfect to everyone else, there was something terribly wrong. He couldn’t name it. No… At least for this time, he wanted to be honest to himself. He knew if he thought enough, he would just find it.   
All he had to do was to answer a simple question. 

_A simple question?  
  
_ He swore to himself in disbelief as he got out the pool and made his way to the changing rooms.   
  
 _A “simple” question… That could ruin everything I have now._  
  
Since the day Sousuke asked him to think about if he was still loving him, Rin ran away from all the possible answers he could give. However, today was different somehow. Since the morning, all he did was to think about five simple looking words.

_Do you still love me?_

If he was still the person he used to be the a year before, he could easily disperse the clouds in his mind. But not now. Not when he learned he could commit himself to someone, other than his dream.  
  
“I need a soothing shower. That’s all.” He sighed loudly but before his hand reached to shower curtain, he heard a painful whimper close by. Curiously and concerned, he searched for the source of that suffering sound. Hesitantly opening another shower’s curtain, a wave of shock made him freeze in his place.

“Sousuke…” was all he managed to whisper before collapsing on the floor besides the dark haired boy who was in complete agony; his eyes closed and his teeth clenched.

“Sousuke…What happened?” He again failed to hear himself properly but the dark haired boy opened his turquoise eyes slightly. When his gaze met with Rin’s ruby eyes, the boy moved to open the distance between them.

“Why are you here?…You shouldn’t have seen me like this..” was what Rin managed to hear in between his painful panting.

_So weak… So tormented…_

This time without hesitation, Rin reached to Sousuke’s hand on his right shoulder. “Let me see…” He tried to pull Sousuke’s hand but when his gaze met with the dark pool of fear in the turquoise eyes, Rin froze in his place once more.

“What are you trying to hide?” softly whispered the red haired boy.

Sousuke averted his gaze and with that, Rin pulled the hand ignoring his resistance. To the scene in front of him, Rin felt as if his heart could explode at any moment.

“Sousuke…You…You shouldn’t be here…” Losing his words, he tried to figure out whether all the wetness on Sousuke’s face was just water.

He could feel, it wasn’t just water for him.

Instinctively he hugged the dark haired boy, carefully not to hurt him further more.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He got no answer back except for the arms wrapped tightly around his waist and the shaking “strong” body in his embrace. Now he knew, it wasn’t just water.

“Sousuke… It’s okay…”

_I have never seen you this broken. Never in my life._  
  
“It’s not okay… Not at all…” He heard the most sorrowful whisper in his entire life. 

“You are in pain… We should go to hospital…” He was trying to calm one of the strongest people in his life.   
  
 _Desperate._

The answer was more shaking, a tighter embrace and the lowest plea he had heard so far.   
  
“I-I don’t want to go… Since you are here… I just want to spend few more moments… Before you go…”   
  
 _Before I go?_    
  
“I’m not going anywhere when you are like this.”   
  
Hearing these words the dark haired boy pulled himself back.   
  
“No… You have to go… I won’t be able to follow…”   
  
Rin felt as if he was just shot by billion poisonous arrows.   
  
“I’m where I have to be” Pulling Sousuke back in his embrace, he whispered faintly to his ear.

_Damn it._  
 _I can’t be the cry-baby._  
 _This time I have to be strong…For both of us._  
  
He stood up and turned off the water. 

“Let’s go to the room.” With a great effort, he managed to stop his hand from trembling and held it for the dark haired “mess” still sitting on the floor. 

_No…I can’t fall apart.  
  
_ Hesitantly, Sousuke held his hand and stood up.   
  
 _You will follow._  
 _I will guide you._  
 _Anywhere you want._  
  
Without letting go of the trembling hand in his, Rin went to their room. 

  
He dried Sousuke.  
He helped him to change.  
Then he merely cared about himself.

Sitting on the bed besides him, he could just remain watching as Sousuke laid his head on his lap and pleaded lower than before.

“Will you stay with me tonight?”

“Even if you said the otherwise, I wouldn’t go… Not until I see you alright” For the first time today, he managed to hear his own determined yet miserable voice.

_How could you convince yourself that much…That I will ever leave you?_

Sousuke raised his head and hugged him lightly. 

“Thank you.”

_Could this hurt any more than this?_

“You would do the same” He was struggling with the words. He was fighting for not to fall into pieces. 

He failed. 

“How dare you think you are less important than anything, anyone?” He grabbed Sousuke’s collar yelling and cried through his chest.

He swore himself.

He tried to pull himself together.

_For both of us!_

He pulled himself back.

He opened his mouth but was clueless about what to tell.

He felt the touch of soft lips on his.

He couldn’t resist.

_No…I don’t want to resist._

His fingertips felt the wetness on the other’s cheeks. 

His heart clenched with pain.

He felt the softness of the lips moving away.

He heard the faintest and the most heart-wrecking “Sorry” in his life.

“Don’t be…” This time he was the one making the dark haired boy feel his softness.

_Cold._

He wanted to make him feel warm.

_No…I can’t say this out loud!_

He silently breathed five simple words to the other’s mouth.  
  
 _Yes, I still love you._

He felt strong arms lowering his body onto the sheets. 

He felt his heart beat racing. 

His ruby eyes met the turquoise ones. 

_Warm._

He touched the soft lips.

He touched the strong neck muscles. 

He touched the well-built chest. 

He felt his heart.

_Racing._

“Sousuke… We shouldn’t… It won’t be good for you…" 

He was trying to resist but he didn’t want him to stop. This time, he wasn’t running away. No…He wanted to feel him. He wanted to embrace him. He wanted to ease his pain. He wanted to see him smile.

The dark haired boy smiled.

"Rin… Only you can be good for me…”

Softness again. 

_I don’t want you to stop… But…_

“Sousuke… Please…” The dark haired boy stopped with a deep fear and a glimpse of anger in his eyes.

“Does this feel wrong to you?”

_No._

“No.” He was appalled when he heard his voice that loud. He needed few minutes to continue.

“No?" 

_The warmness in your eyes._   
_The softness of your touch._   
_The pure bliss in your smile._

 ”No… But you’re hurt… I don’t want to hurt you more…”

The dark haired boy kissed him deeply.

He felt determined hands moving up on his torso. 

He felt their warmth on his naked skin. 

"Hurting me? You can only fix me.” The dark haired boy whispered to his ear. “Will you be mine tonight?”

_I want you._

Rin moved his hands to the edge of Sousuke’s t-shirt. Creasing it, he looked at him in his eyes.

_Desire. Same as mine._

“Are you sure about this?” He wouldn’t hesitate. But now was different.

The dark haired boy guided Rin’s hands on his torso. 

His fingertips felt his naked skin.

_Feels just like… Fire._

“I’m sure. You are the only one.”

Their hearts were racing. 

_So are_  you.  
  
As Sousuke lifted him, he wrapped his arms around his strong neck.

He felt Sousuke’s determined hands on his legs. Laying on the bed, he enjoyed the dark haired boy expose him completely. 

_You look… So beautiful._

He felt the strong hands spread his legs further.

He gasped to the soft kisses on his inner thighs. 

“Sousuke…” He moaned his name lowly. 

While wandering his hands all over his legs, the dark haired boy looked at the red head.

_Pure lust. Same as mine._

“Rin… You sound just perfect.”

He felt Sousuke’s tongue on his length. 

He felt his hand on his waist.

He felt his hot mouth on the tip. 

He felt his head moving.

_This feels so good._

“Sousuke…You…” He felt his cheeks burning. He was panting to the sweet teasing pace.

_Don’t stop._

He moaned to the strong fingers massaging his twitching entrance softly. 

“Sousuke… You….You should stop…If you… I don’t want to cause you suffer more…” His fastened breathing and heavy panting didn’t let him talk and his own body was moving against what his mind wanted to show. 

His hands moved onto Sousuke’s head. Pulling his hair, he could only moan louder as Sousuke bobbed his head up and down in a devouring pace. 

The dark haired boy moved his head back kissing the tip.

Once again, ruby met the turquoise. 

Once again, the sweet soft lips met his parted lips. 

“Suck.” Two fingers touched his lips lightly.

_Hesitant?_

To prove him wrong, Rin sucked the fingers slowly and teasingly until they were coated enough with his saliva.

The dark haired boy moved down kissing all over his body.

He closed his eyes feeling his fingers inside. 

As they teased his insides, he opened his eyes slightly.

_This pleasure… I want to see you.._

When they hit his sweet spot, he wrapped his arms around Sousuke’s neck.

He pulled him close.

He danced his tongue around his.

He moaned into his mouth when the fingers were placed by him.

_I want to feel you more._

The dark haired boy completely buried him inside the redhead.

“Rin… You are… So tight… Am I hurting you?”

_Don’t you worry no more._

As an answer he rolled his hips.

“No… You can move”

Sousuke began to move slowly.

Kisses. 

Soft, tender kisses.

“Relax…”

He wrapped his legs around the dark haired boy’s waist.

He held him close as Sousuke buried his face into the crook of the redhead’s neck.

Their breaths were racing.

Their heart beats were running wild.

They were moaning each other’s names. 

“Sousuke…I’m…” He lost his words as his head spun with pure pleasure. 

“Rin… I can also hold no more…”

As he was filled by him, Sousuke’s body pressed further against his.

He caressed his back.

He kissed his shoulder softly.

He felt empty inside.

He closed his eyes.

_I want this. Again._

“Are you alright?” The dark haired boy whispered with concern.

Opening his eyes, he held Sousuke’s head in between his hands.

“I am perfect as long as you are smiling like this." He kissed him softly.

He felt the soft lips moving away from his.

He felt them on his neck.

On his collarbones.

On his chest.

On his abdomen.

_Something… Wet?_

Realizing he widened his eyes with shock.

The dark haired boy was slowly licking all the traces of his climax. 

He opened his mouth but could only gasp when Sousuke turned him over. 

He felt Sousuke’s hands on each side of his waist.

He felt him lifting his ass up.

He buried his face into the pillow.

As Sousuke’s tongue explored his insides and his mouth was sucking his own climax, he felt himself burning all over his body.

_Once more…_

Once again, he moaned his name.

Once again he felt the strong hands exploring all over his body.

Once again he heard a plea like whisper.

"I want to hear you. I want to hear even the faintest sound that escapes from your mouth. I have waited for so long to miss any of this.”

He felt him deep inside.

He turned his head on the pillow and moaned loudly in pure ecstasy to his every thrust.

Once again, they were one.

“Rin…Do you have any idea… How beautiful you are…”

_You are perfect._

Once again, he was over the edge.

Once again, he was filled with the warmness.

They collapsed on the bed together. 

Once again, their gazes met.

Once again, their heart beats were synchronized. 

The dark haired boy pulled the redhead into his embrace.

“Thank you.”

He pulled him closer.

“I wonder… Will you still love me tomorrow?”

He was speechless until feeling Sousuke’s calmed down warm breath on his forehead.

Closing his eyes, he whispered faintly. 

_Always._


End file.
